Another thing I treasure in this life are friends who can just be. They can just sit with you and the silence is more of a blanket than an oddity. Of course, to be honest, it is difficult for me to be silent. I have always admired those of you who can let your thoughts and musings remain a secret; however, I will forever struggle with this. BUT, there are those rare silent lulls that can either feel empty or they can ease the soul into peace. All of my closest friends are like that - they are my peace blankets. At the same time they are vivacious, funny, intelligent, and easy to just "be" with. And, two of my Milford friends (who are now really "Chicago friends") kidnapped me today for brunch (Heather Horton and Heather Wilson...and Wilson's baby, Grey!). Surprise, surprise! I chose "Food Dance Cafe." I think this is a theme. They also were given a ROCKSTAR performance by both Brody and Gideon. Gideon even broke out some new moves. Heather and Heather do that, as well: inspire an impromptu dance party. Thank you for being with me today and for understanding my Gideon's breakdowns. Knowing I'm never judged by how I respond to these breakdowns is so soothing to me. Mmmm... sweet lullaby blanket of friends...
This life has glimpses of lullabies and The Twilight Zone. Sometimes I have to open and shut my eyes a few times just to make sure this isn't an insane dream. It's not. My baby boy who loathed food, was only interested in playing and laughing and being busy-busy-busy, and loved to make people smile is now lethargic, food obsessed, and easily triggered into an angry rage. I know the nurses kept telling me to prepare for the day when I ask, "Who IS this child and where is mine?!" The day has arrived even though I didn't believe what I heard. I won't doubt you again, nurses. You KNOW your stuff! Tick-tock, steroids! Your days are numbered for this round.
Speaking of... Please send up prayers on Monday night. I am dreading this night. Gideon will not be allowed to eat or drink after midnight that night, and we all know about the new eating schedule: up at 2am and awake for the rest of the day eating, eating, eating! When he wakes up ready for his all-you-can-eat buffet, he will be so very upset when there is a refusal of service. Understatement, yes, but I am trying to be as up-up-up! as possible. Yes, it is safe to say that I will be coasting on your prayers since I will want to hide somewhere in my basement rather than dealing with my mini-Mr. Hyde!
Prayers, indeed! I am praying that God will just possess this boy and let him sleep until morning......God CAN do that, you know! =)
ReplyDeleteThoughts are with you, Amanda. I'm so happy you are surrounded by such great friends. Now... get some SLEEP! (Easy for me to say)
ReplyDeletepraying for you, amanda! do the nurses have any tips for you for monday night? like, can he "load up" earlier? (i'm sure you've tried that and a million other things by now,.... i'm an idiot! lol!) anyway, i will definitely pray that he sleeps through the night for you, and things go better than you can imagine. much love to you,
ReplyDeletegina
If it gets to be too much, I'm usually up at 2am anyway. I'll be in GR but I'll still be able to answer a phone call to try to make you feel a bit better :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so very sorry, sweetheart. I'm usually up all night too - and if not a phone call, you can catch me on IM anytime.
ReplyDeleteYahoo - njkrempa@yahoo.com
MSN - auntie_mom@hotmail.com
I'm sure Tom has our phone number, since I understand he and MSK have been communicating a bit lately. Use it anytime you want to hear a friendly, supportive voice!!!
Much love, hugs, prayers, kisses, positive vibes and HAPPY THOUGHTS heading your way!
YOU'RE DOING GREAT!!!!!!!!
~~Aunt Nancy~~